Below are the 4 most recent journal entries recorded in ernie27mann's InsaneJournal:

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011
9:31 pm	I did not just get fat, I used weight to protect me from sexuality , from getting attractive , from My Fat History Looking Through Sex And Sexual Abuse Weight and sexual abuse There are a few types of fatties around. The first group of overweight folks is the least difficult to comprehend: they put bodily delights over everything else, and they overeat because they love to eat. They overeat, probably drink a lot too. Then there is the fatty who eats simply because life is not all it promised to be. It isn't interesting enough, not really loving enough, not really fun enough. This type of overweight people eat out of boredom. Even the food does not taste good enough, but it keeps them bottled up, and keeps them from going for life, all out... they don't need to face up to their fears, their stresses, their insecurities, or others that want to keep them down. In certain respect I do belong to this second category. But I have another facet... which takes me to the 3rd category of fatties: This 2nd group is people who have a problem with their self-worth. Their looks, their smarts. Maybe they were verbally abused growing up, Maybe they were beaten. Maybe they were sexually abused. The reaction to this mistreatment ranges from mild to severe, typically includes self-abuse, harmful addictions to substances, food, or abuse itself. Or maybe anger, blame, helping... Anything that keeps repeating the early experience. Sexual abuse can vary from being touched, outwardly innocently, but with sexual fantasies. One of the ways people do not believe that they are perpetrators is their thoughts and their dreams. They think that their thoughts are their and that they can be outrageous and harmful, the person they want will not know. But truth be told, it is not true. A child is much more psychic than an grownup, and they are more conscious of your thoughts and fantasies, at least in regards to them, than you'd ever consider. This means that if you desire to feel someone, even if you don't, they can experience being subjected, being touched, being violated. And react subtly or strongly to it. Which means that if you desire to touch someone, even if you don't, they can experience being exposed, being touched, being violated. And react subtly or violently to it. The abused child does not have the capacity to create boundaries or protect themselves from the predator. My story: the summer before my fourth birthday my nanny took a vacation and took me home with herself to her village. It was some kind of country fair, looking at my memories, I can't tell what was the reason for all that celebration, eating and drinking. Come evening, I was lost. I didn't know anyone, and I was starting to worry. A man approached me, reached his hand down, and I thought: I was found. I went happily with this man, feeling safe. He took me in a barn and threw me into the hay then threw himself on top of me. We tussled, just like I used to with my brother, I remember giggling. But then I felt a sharp pain and everything went black. When I woke up the first thing I noticed was the head of the cows over me. I watched them for a while, then I tried to get up but could not. Sitemap And that is what I am here to do. Assist you and me to put that whole thing behind us, and be normal, like we never had a chance before. (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 21st, 2011
11:14 am	Struggling With Your Weight? It is a Virus! Obesity Is A Viral Disease Meme is a Thought And Behavioral Virus. According to Wikipedia, a meme is "An element of a culture or behavior that may be passed from one individual to another by nongenetic means, esp. imitation" What Wikipedia doesn't say that it is NOT innocent. Once infected, it is hard to get rid of. To stay uninfected takes all you got... Now, stay slim, right? What's wrong here? Human Being, perfect after its kind This is a loose translation of what the bible says. When we look at ourselves and our lives, this is a nonsensical statement: we don't feel perfect after our kind, we feel flawed, our lives don't work, or at least not the way we want it, our bodies don't work the way we envision perfection. How can we be perfect and imperfect at the same time? How can a statement in the bible be true and false at the same time? What is happening? We'll examine what is the truth behind this seeming anomaly through an analogy. Let's look at human being through the analogy of a computer system. A computer system is made up of several basic elements, these are: the hardware: your body, your physiology the operating software: the desire to feed itself, to eliminate, to procreate, and to cause life to be bigger, better, and satisfying. task specific software input aka data: what you do and what you say output: the quality of your life Our bodies are well designed, and apart from birth defects, it serves us and life perfectly. I even know about cases where birth defects healed themselves when the other elements were changed. Like a man, Dr. Richard Schulze healed his genetically damaged heart by not succumbing to the doctors' opinion that it was incurable and that he was going to die before he hit 25. He is now approaching 60, and healthy as a bull. Our DNA, the part of every cell that tells the cell what kind of new cell to produce is perfect. Without damage on your part it will see that you live well till a ripe old age, happy and productive. As you can see, the operating software and the hardware will not be able to give you everything a human being wants, it is going to take some learning all kinds of skills. That, on the computer, are the software programs you buy or download, bookkeeping, word processor, browsing software, email, got it?. We'll take a close look at these. This is where all the troubles begin. Your entire computer has one goal, it was designed for that purpose: to give you the perfect life. But there is a problem, a glitch, something that has eluded you and us thus far... The whole system has a ground rule: the operator has free will about installing task specific software, and allowing or entering input. Except in your early childhood. Then, by design, you were existing in a constant hypnotic state, where every suggestion took root in your psyche, so you took it all in, the good, the bad, and the ugly. On a computer, the input comes through you or through the internet, but in real life there are a lot more input sources, and they all download programs on your "computer." If you look, the analogy is really great, because there is your own speaking, the keyboard, and there is the cultural conversation, the internet. I'll include your parents, your family, your teachers, media under the umbrella of internet, because it makes it easier to see. Ultimately, what gets downloaded onto your computer is up to you... at least it should be. But your critical faculties are off, your point of view is too close and your cone of vision too narrow... no wonder that you can't make the right decisions what is good for you and what isn't. There is something wrong here One of the results of that is a download that you got on your computer at an early age is: "there is something wrong here" Proof to the fact that it's not part of our human dna, or operating system is that children brought up far from civilization do not have that notion. But shortly after they are brought back to "civilization" they catch the virus and lose their edge. About Sophie (Comment on this)
Monday, April 18th, 2011
6:17 pm	Diets Don't Work, The Truth Is What Makes You Fat Is Dieting Diets Don't Work, The Truth Is What Makes You Fat Is Dieting Diets don't work I know, I know, I am not the first person to say this. but... In the book Diets Don't Work by Dr. Bob Schwartz, he has this famous line: "I had to call in fat one morning..." That's very amusing, right? The expression you expect is "sick" so when he says fat, you roll on the floor laughing. At least I did. Dr. Bob owned a gym. He was there every day. And he needed to call in fat, because none of his clothes fit him. Now, that forces you to ponder a little bit, I hope.. And the people who frequented the fitness center, the moment they started to diet, they eventually wound up fat. He was theorizing that the folks that restricted their diets did some thing to their bodies that made their body want to store fat. The method he demonstrated his theory was truly intriguing: he put a few skinny guys on a restricted diet fore someweeks. The guys lost a couple of pounds, but when they started to eat like before the diet, instantly, after a long time of trying to put on pounds, they gained an extra 5-10-15 pounds. This is how he arrived to the conclusion that in the end what makes people fat is dieting itself. The book is quite basic, though very well crafted. It says one thing, something that we've been told for many years, but not a lot of us will be able to (blank) pay attention to: eat when you're hungry, and quit eating when you are no longer hungry. While this is true and tested out (I think, because I was never able to comply!) the problem with his strategy is that it is still a diet. A restriction. Something that demands you to concentrate on your behavior, have perseverence, and therefore it does not really work. Don't forget? diets don't work. So why did he do an additional diet after proclaiming that diets don't work? Because we, as humans, have always engaged in reactive conduct. From the limited perspective of the human mind The second error people make is they are looking where everyone is searching, like the drunk in the joke. What, you do not know that joke? The police officer is observing a guy seemingly looking for something, nighttime, below the lamppost. "What seems to be the problem?" he asks when he finally decides to approach the guy. The man, obviously drunk, says, "Officer, I am looking for my keys. Can you help me find them?" So now both of them are looking, to no avail. The policemen finally asks: "Did you lose your keys right here?" "Oh no," answers the drunk, "I lost them over there." "Over there?" exclaims the cop. "Then why are you looking for them here?" "Simple, officer" answers the drunk. "It's dark there, and I can't see a thing. Here, under the streetlight I can see." So this is how humanity has been behaving for thousands of years, looking for answers not where they are, but where there is light, where they have already looked. Next time you can't find your keys or your watch or your glasses, observe yourself going back to the same spot, a drawer, your purse, several times, even after you are sure it's not there. It's funny, and it's the same thing. But where are the answers? Where are the answers that would make a difference in the area of epidemic obesity? Where are we not looking? The Science of Losing Weight or Diets Don't Work, The Fact Is What Makes You Fat Is Dieting (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 7th, 2011
10:52 pm	How to Create Anything, financial abundance How to Make things happen what you want also know as the Lacking Puzzle Piece of the Law of Attraction Jigsaw Puzzle Everybody wants to Create our desires and necessities. We all want magic. Everybody wants some otherworldly help to solve our problems. But... We all believe, in some way, that the Universal Law of Attraction is true, however you surely don't know just how to get it to work for you. The teachers that try to teach it make it appear so simple, however, a whopping 98% of the people that test it, never have success with it. How to Create what you want or the Missing Piece of the Law of Attraction Jigsaw Puzzle: Desire or How to Be in Vibrational Synch With Abundance, Love, and Achieving success Some belief systems command to you to subdue your yearnings. They say that it's the cause of evil. Maybe even a spiritual crime. Christianity, Buddhism... to bring up the ones I am aware. The Kabbalah on the other hand teaches to awaken desire, because that is how to Make things happen Everything . Is, what those belief systems teach, benefiting you? Or is it benefiting the people who preach it? Are they correct to order you to diminish your desires? That you put out your inner flame? Is joy and happiness attainable when you're penniless, sick and tired, by yourself, and chaste? Or is there a erroneous (or maybe evil and selfish) interpretation in the midst of it? Are they in your corner, or are they stealing from you god given right: to have it all? This post will take a look at that and offer you the knowledge of what is between you and getting what you desire. It'll show you How to Make something happen what you want . Question 1: What's the divine purpose of desire? Could it be healthy for you? As well as how about wanting? The Universal Law of Attraction? Lots of people would like to have money. More precisely, they need a lot more income. They consider the Law of Attraction, and learn that your vibration should be in vibrational equilibrium with what you want. The initial question we should handle, what's the distinction between want and desire. On the outside, there isn't any distinction, do you agree? Want, desire, wish, hope... they all appear to have a very similar meaning. The difference isn't linguistic. It is in the actual way of thinking. It is in the very vibrational frequency of these apparently identical sensations or thought patterns.. With the exception that the vibrationof those seemingly exact same motivations is vastly as well as totally different. Want vibrates between 50 to 75 on the scale of consciousness. Desire resonates at 295. Wish resonates at 295. Hope resonates between 310 and 320. That is very interesting, ? Now, in case you are not familiar with what vibration or vibrational frequency stands for and whether it's good or bad, the more effective you are in your life, the more you can possess, the closer you're to brilliance,on the higher number you resonate. Whenever your resonance number gets higher, you get rested fast, look fantastic, get along with people around you, your doubts diminish , your aspirations and mental capacity is higher. However what results in a high resonance number? Is it bodily, or is it something inside you? It's clear to me that it's your perception, it's your world view, and your own self in it. When you manage to change your attitudeyour vibration changes accordingly. Up or down, according to the direction of your change. And with a higher vibration it is easier toMake something happen Anything . Inthis particular article, this will be our focus. Let's look at closely at the mindsetthat accompanies these words, OK? and also what is it about something that makes it a higher frequency that something so similar sounding. Let's first take a look at want or wanting from a mindset standpoint. tithing (Comment on this)